Is Everyone Running For President?

I spent all my computer time answering email, so I'm just going to wing it and do a quick comedy post. Politics, comedy, same thing these days. John McCain announced he is running for President ... on the David Letterman show. I mean, where else would a serious politician make such an announcement? How else to show America that you've got the right stuff to exercise presidential judgment and control the secret launch codes that can destroy civilization as we know it inside thirty minutes than trading quips with Letterman?

Or maybe Letterman is just angling to be the first Secretary of Comedy, a cabinet office that the electorate would certainly support. If we can have a national Poet Laureate, we can have a Secretary of Comedy! And with a good chunk of the blue-staters taking their public policy cues from comedy shows these days, it's just getting hard to tell the difference between comedy and politics. I almost think some people take their comedy more seriously than they do politics. Just ask Michael Richards. He used to be funny. Now he's political.

And is everyone going to run for President? Will this be like the California special election? That worked out pretty well — Californians are happy with Arnold. So maybe the media should just assume that every single person holding public office or who can get a table reserved for lunch in Hollywood is running for President, then just run stories for people who announce they are not running for President. Those not running automatically enter the pool of potential Vice Presidents. You know, the serious people, the ones not funny enough to be the first-string entertainers, the Ed McMahons of national office. Elect a comedian to be the First Entertainer, but make sure there's a sober and stoic Vice President, a failed comedian, a peacemaker, to actually run the country behind the scenes. Maybe in 2008 we should just ignore the first name on the ticket and focus on the VP contest, the important race. Here's your slogan: "In 2008, Number Two is Number One."

Comments

[john f.]

No. 2 is the new No.1 -- I like it; and he or she will be wearing orange, which is the new gray, right?

[Floyd the Wonderdog]

Let me take this opportunity to announce MY candidacy for President of these United States. Please send money.

[Mike Parker]

Will this be like the California special election? That worked out pretty well — Californians are happy with Arnold.

Actually, many of us AREN'T. He campaigned as a market-forces, small-government conservative, but he's morphed into a state-control, big-government socialist. There's a lot of animosity toward him from Republicans in this state.

[Jettboy]

Mike, and you didn't see that coming? Not a Californian, but I thought it was about getting a Governor out of office and then filling the space. The elections were a popularity contest and not a policy one.

[Dave]

Well, all elections are, in some sense, a popularity contest. In the California special election a few years back, there were actually two separate electoral events, the first to remove the former governor and a second to choose his successor.

[Anthony]

Americans should not consider Mitt Romney for President precisely because he is a Mormon. Mr. Romney is entitled to his beliefs, but Americans are entitled to judge how stupid the man is to believe in the Book of Mormon, which “forms the doctrinal foundation of the Church” and “speaks the word of God to all the world.". ( Encyclopedia of Mormonism). The founder of this “religion”, Joseph Smith, claimed that in 1823 an angel named Moroni appeared to him and revealed gold plates written in “reformed Egyptian letters” buried in a hill near his Palmyra, New York home, plates which contained "the fullness of the everlasting Gospel." After digging up this book, which Smith claimed no one else could look upon or risk instant death, Smith began "translating" the text "by the power of God.", using the technique of burying his face in his hat in order to shut out all light and allow him to look into mystical “seeing stones”, the identical technique used for treasure hunts had culminated in Smith’s criminal conviction for fraud upon an elderly man who financed one treasure hunt expedition. This book was a cunning, wicked fraud calculated by Smith to deceive thousands. Romney’s professed belief in this ridiculous work of fiction, which forms the foundation and basis for such wild and preposterous beliefs that dead Mormon believers will become worshipped demi-gods on alien planets after death, demonstrates Romney cannot be trusted to review and critique thousands of non-fiction documents President reads from trained analysts at the CIA, FBI, and other national security agencies about actions of terrorists and nations in the world that seek to do us harm. Mr. Romney’s belief in this fabricated book, and his statements regarding his perceptions of morality obviously based thereon, demonstrates that for his entire lifetime he has made personal and policy decisions upon “failed unintelligence”, as influenced and guided by John Smith’s fictional work called the Book of Mormon. Though he has the constitutional right to stupidly believe what he wants to as to religion, we have the right to judge his intellect for such beliefs. We cannot risk Mitt Romney’s inability to separate fact from fiction as a national leader, and thereby his proven lack of intellectual acuity.. Anyone dumb enough to vote for Mitt Romney is sufficiently ignorant to believe in the Book of Mormon, and probably should become a Mormon too, but please, stay out of national politics.

[Dave]

Anthony, are you aware that millions of American voters have the same attitude towards Christians as a class -- that (to take your approach) anyone stupid enough to believe in the fantastic supernatural events recounted in the Bible is thereby unfit to serve as President? Or anywhere else in government, for that matter? Screeds like yours, in fact, probably lend support to that view.

By the way, I didn't catch your Christian denomination. It would be nice to place your comments in the context of your own religious beliefs, Anthony.

[Todd]

I imagine we will have to hear allot of this kind of garbage up until this election is over. I’m always amazed at people who can respect the faith of snake handlers, but not our faith. They can see Jim and Tammy Baker or Jimmy Swaggart as Gods oracles, but Joseph Smith was a fraud. His faith was such that he sealed his testimony with his blood they on the other hand cried on TV and do MTV specials. Like I said it’s going to be a long time until these elections are over.